So...about those 31 days...yeah, I didn't keep up. It is ironic, isn't it? A series about being consistent - and I was inconsistent. I kind of predicted it, didn't I?
I have been thinking a lot lately about why I am inconsistent. Not beating myself up about it, just trying to really look at the why's. This is what I came up with:
Number one: I have a lot on my plate. And so do a lot of other people I know who also tell me they are inconsistent about exercise, meal planning, getting up early, or the likes.
Number two: I set goals that are too lofty. At least they are too lofty for this time in my life. Blogging once or twice a week probably would have worked. But, every day? It is just unrealistic now. Possibly, yes. But not probably.
Number three: I put off what I can't do perfectly. I have been kind of avoiding this blog because I want it to be better. I don't like the way it reads as "look at this wonderful life, praise Jesus!" I want to write about the more complicated, nuanced, realness of this life, but I just don't have the time or energy or the quiet to write about anything that takes deep thought. So I revert to a pretty shallow style. The perfectionist in me hates this. Hates putting anything out there that I am not 100% proud of.
But, I am trying to fight against this instinct, and remind myself why I am writing. Not to impress anyone. Not to win awards. But simply so my family will have a written account of our life together and my thoughts, however basic, about it. Also, I hope that perhaps I might connect with other people out there through this blog.
So, I will continue to post here -- imperfectly and inconsistently. With the hope that doing something is better than planning to do something perfectly and never doing it.
That's brilliant, Samantha. Don't try to be 'perfect' - just be who you are perfectly, and who you are is who you are! You are meant to be you, with all your faults and failings, maybe untidy or unorganised, or tired?, but unique and loving and caring and wonderful. "The wound is the place where the Light enters you". Keep smiling and laughing and loving yourself, as well as everyone else.
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to reading your next blog in a week or so.
Lots of love, Margaret
I hope you will see this....I have followed your blog for a while, and just read your comment on K's blog about your 10yo son. Please, check this out: www.integratedlistening.com . I did this with my son and it is very effective (they will let you train and do it yourself if you are a "mom in the trenches"). I'd be very happy to talk to you about it - you can email me at penny@waylandmusic.com .
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